Baldor Hazeldrift urged his mount onwards towards the foe, the dragon's mighty roar filling his veins with adrenaline, his heart with courage. "Sick 'em, boy! Sick 'em!"

The dragon rushed forwards and, with a nonchalant paw swipe, rent a long gash in the ogre's chest. The ogre howled with pain and rage, and brought his club down towards the dragon's head, but Ranjir Kjeldoran ducked out of the way and clamped down upon the ogre's leg.

"That's it, boy!" Baldor cried. The ogre screamed in rage, flailing about. A great growl rose from Ranjir's throat as he shook his head from side to side, tearing muscle from bone. The ogre went down to his knees, screaming, then fell to the ground, silent. "Yeah! Woo-hoo! Nothing can beat us, eh, Ranjir?" Baldor cried, patting his pet dragon, who purred deeply in his throat. The dragon tromped over to the ogre's hip and gnawed, pulling the leg away from the rest of the body. "Come on, boy, let's get going."

The dragon tromped off towards the forest, absently gnawing upon the ogre's leg. Then the ground shook. The sky grew as dark as the night and a cold wind sprang up. Ranjir dropped the leg, forgotten, and looked wildly about. Baldor had to float up and hover to avoid being thrown off-balance. "Whoah, boy! Calm!"

The ground shook again, and Baldor was quickly becomming very worried. He looked all about, yet all he could see was the roiling clouds which now blanketed the sky. "I don't like the looks of this, boy. Keep alert."

Deep in the forest, there was the sound of screaming, squealing. Baldor knew this to be the sound of the giant trees being torn and crushed, thrown to the ground. He looked fearfully in the noise's direction, yet saw nothing. Ranjir began growling deep within his throat.

There was silence. Then the woods virtually exploded before the pair as trees and branches were thrown back before the mighty figure of a stone giant. Wearing a tiger skin vest and wielding a huge stone axe, it grit its teeth and fumed in rage. It opened its mouth to let out a huge bellow, lifted its axe high, and brought it down upon Ranjir, cleaving the dragon's tough body in two.

Baldor swooped up and away, screaming, "NO!!!!!!!" He pulled upon the magic of the land and sent a huge fireball slamming into the stone giant's chest, forcing it backwards and to fall on its rear. It sat there, squinting its eyes, and finally sighted Baldor. It gave a toothy grin. "Me like pixie. Naughty pixie. Me teach pixie lesson."

The giant stood again, just to be knocked down once more by the pixie's ball of fire. It grumbled and stood a third time, only to be knocked down again. It let out an enraged roar and leaped to its feet. "BAD PIXIE!!! PIXIE ... MAKE ... ME ... MAAAAAAAD!!!!!!!"

He swung his huge axe, cleaving the air with loud swooshes. Bellowing and swinging, the stone giant advanced. Baldor threw another fireball at the giant, shattering a shoulder. The giant's arm fell to the ground with a loud thump, and molten rock bled from the wound. The creature bellowed with rage, its voice making the very air vibrate. It swung its axe again, smacking into Baldor, who was sent careening to the ground. A wing snapped as he landed, causing him to cry out.

The stone giant shook with laughter. "Me teach naughty pixie lesson. Naughty pixie no try hurt big strong giant anymore. Naughty pixie never gonna hurt nobody anymore. HAHAHAHAHA!!!" It raised its foot ...

From nowhere, a huge ball of ice slammed into the stone giant, immediately covering him with a freezing layer of the stuff. He strained against this strange prison, yet was unable to make even the slightest move. He was frozen.

Baldor lay upon the ground panting, wondering what had happened. His sensative pixie ears picked up a slight whistling sound. His eyes scanned the skies and finally locked on to a tiny speck, slowly growing bigger. The whistling grew louder and more definable. He eventually was able to discern it as a long scream. The speck grew in size until it looked vaguely humanoid. Then it could be seen as definitely pixie.

The pixie's scream grew louder until it was cut short as the tiny body fell flat on its face. It dragged itself up and shook its head, mumbling something about flying lessons. Then it darted up and over to Baldor to land by his side. "Wh- ... who are you?" Baldor managed to ask through his gritted teeth. His wing would never heal.

"I am Cyng," the pixie replied. Suddenly Baldor felt perfect, his stamina returned, his pain erased, his wing healed as though it had never been broken, his connection with the land's magic restored. There wasn't even any sensation, it just WAS. He stood and bowed deeply before this legendary being who stood before him. Cyng chuckled and said, "Don't bow, weirdo. :P" And with that, he grabbed Baldor's collars and screamed, "BUNNY!!!" Baldor chuckled uneasily.

Cyng looked over to the giant, fingered the glowing mace at his belt, then shook his head. He raised his voice. "Hey you stupid giant! Don't pick on my people, got it?" A huge fireball appeared out of nowhere and thawed the giant. The giant put its foot down and growled.

"Mean pixie make me cold, then hot. Pixies hurt me, break my arm, make me catch fire. Me no like pixies! ME HATE PIXIES!!!" The giant reared around and grabbed its fallen arm, holding it to its shoulder where molten rock still oozed. The rock cooled and solidified, rejoining the arm to the shoulder. The giant hefted its axe, reared back, and swung. It froze two inches from the PixieLord's body, encased with ice.

"You don't listen well, do you, giant?"

"No, he doesn't," came a voice from nowhere. It was a snake-like voice, whispering yet audible. It sent chills down Baldor's spine. Baldor leapt into the air and looked around. He could see nothing. Suddenly there was another stone giant next to the first. Then five more appeared out of small clouds of smoke. They all grinned to each other, though one merely stood there and picked its nose.

"Call your hunchbacks away, Earthlord, or you will no longer have any," Cyng said. Athos, the Earthlord, appeared beside Cyng, not quite human, yet not quite stone. Scars ran along his body, yet looked more like veins of rare and common minerals.

"Cyng, my friend, 'tis not I who does this, but another."

"Who?" Cyng asked.

Just then, one of the stone giants plopped down and began to play with itself, though it had not previously be apparent that any had any gender at all.

"Jizmak," they said in unison. Baldor boggled at the concept.

A great moan and grunt echoed over the land, and a huge drop of white goo fell from the sky, landing between the giants and the pixies and Earthlord. From this puddle of goo a being formed, becoming humanoid. It looked crazed and quite bugged-out, with bloodshot eyes and shaky hands. It grinned an evil grin. Jizmak looked at one of the giants, and a tiny man crawled from the giant's butt. Jizmak cackled with glee.

"Cut it out, Jiz, You know we're not supposed to interfere with the mortals," Athos said.

"T'wasn't I, kids," Jizmak said.

"No, it wasn't," the serpentine voice echoed.

"Then who?" Cyng asked. Baldor scratched his head, then, nonchalantly, eyed Ranjir's corpse. Cyng caught Baldor's movement, and waggled a finger at the corpse. It knit itself together and tromped over to Baldor, whuffling and grinning his doothy dragon grin. Baldor hugged Ranjir's snout.

Baldor suddenly felt a deep, mortal fear welling up from within his soul. Ranjir whimpered. From the darkness, a being took shape. "Hiya, Cauch," Cyng said.

"Piss off, happy person," Cauchemar, the Nightmare King, replied. "And no, it wasn't me. Lot of us immortals up and about tonight. You damned happy people, life-lovers. You make me sick." Jizmak exchanged a "spare me" look with Cyng.

A door opened out of nowhere, and a tall man stepped through. He closed the door, and it vanished. "What's up?" the newcomer asked.

"Someone's transporting nasty creatures and making them attack mortals, Chaos," Cyng replied. Chaos raised an eyebrow and said, "Oh really?" Athos nodded.

Baldor shook his head in amazement and confusion. Ranjir had since retrived his ogre leg and was happilly, obliviously gnawing upon it. Ranjir looked up, however, when a salty gale blasted the area, and a beautiful woman was suddenly there.

"What're yoo all doing here," she asked.

"Trying to figure out who's screwing with my people, Lanta," Cyng replied. "I don't really appreciate it." By this time, the stone giants' behavior had developed into a fully-fledged orgy, which set Jizmak to uncontrollable cackling and the others to either ignoring or smirking.

Just then, a fright fire-hawk appeared, and from its back stepped a beautiful lady. The hawk flew up and perched itself upon her shoulder. A plane of reality pivoted sideways, and a handsome man stepped out from behind it. The lady hugged everyone, and they hugged back. Cyng hugged the man.

"Hiya, Zurie and Mousers," Chaos said. The lady and man smiled, and stood to the side, holding hands.

Baldor found himself daydreaming suddenly, and, oddly, from the bliss found only in his imagination, a man appeared. The man huggged Azurel and Cyng and Cyng said, "Hiya, Tradescant. Get a shorter name. :P"

Tradescant smirked and bonked Cyng over his head. It hurt to even watch. Trad asked, "What's up?"

Mouseglove said, "Apparently, someone's been transporting these horny giants here and bugging this pixie." Azurel hugged Baldor, who blushed.

Tradescant nodded and said, "Odd."

Another person appeared, smiled, and said, "Hey, it worked!" Cyng immediately flew up to hug the other pixie, who hugged back.

"Long time no see, Marcus. Good to see you," Cyng said. Azurel hugged him and Mouseglove smiled.

Suddenly the ground shook with a deep rumbling. Everyone looked about, and relaxed when they saw its source. The stone giants, sated, had fallen asleep and were snoring. Chaos said, "Hang on a sec." A moment later, they all disappeared.

Cyng nodded.

Vall simply was.

Everyone hugged Vall, who did not hug back, but said, "Whodunnit?"

"Dunno," Cyng said. He shrugged. Vall frowned. "Prolly yer feet. Lord knows they've grown their own minds by now." Vall smirked. Cyng turned to the reader and apologized if he'd forgotten to include any other immortals.

"Well I wanna know who dunnit," Vall said. Silence.

The ground began to rumble and a cold wind swept through the area. Suddenly, a huge dragon appeared before them. It reared back and roared. The ground shook with the volume. Cyng pointed at it and it disappeared. "Doh," he said.

The ground began to rumble and a cold wind swept through the area. Suddenly, a huge Pez dispensor appeared before them. It shouted "PEZ!!!" Everyone fell down laughing. Vall smirked, gestured, and Mr. Pez was gone, dropping Pez all over the ground. Atlanta screamed "ACKA ACKA!" and grabbed it all before anyone else could get anything. Cyng pouted.

He squeezed Athos, whose head tiled backwards at the neck, a hole opening up. A three pieces of Pez shot out and landed in Cyng's hand. Cyng thanked Athos heartily, then munched his Pez. Azurel giggled and Lanta said, "vitvitvitvitvitvitvitvitvit!"

Thunder cracked across the sky.

The ground shook, throwing everyone from their feet.

A wind howled through the trees and across the land.

Great gaping rents cracked in the ground, throwing up pillars of fire.

From the shadows formed a sillhouette.

A great, serpentine cackle ran through everyone's mind, and they cowered in fear.

The figure rose up above them and cackled gleefully. It gestured, and bolts of lightning shot down from the sky, starting flashfires. Thunder cracked and the clouds boiled in the sky. The earth shook and the forest became an inferno. Their minds rang with the dark shadow's laughter at their puny powers. He froze first Vall, then Chaos, huge blocks of ice encasing both. Azurel flew up and was thrown by an invisible force into a gaping hole in the earth like a ragdoll, which slammed shut. Mouseglove and Athos simply ceased to exist. Jizmak was reduced to a pool of white goo by a single lightning bolt. Cauchemar's eyes narrowed in hatred as his line was disconnected. Marcus was torn inside-out by an unseen hand. Tradescant was enveloped in a stream of molten earth. Ranjir went up in flames and was instantly powdered.

Cyng purged the shadow guy and sitebanned him.

Baldor said, "Kewlies."

(written by Cyng Swiftwind)